Okay, I never expected to see the ” lonely ” part.
In real life you will always find me sitting next to a person and laughing. Joking around with people. It is rare for me to sit alone. Because honestly, being alone scares me. I don’t know why but it just does. And even if I am sitting alone, its probably because the book I am reading is just too interesting for me to let it and read it later at home. Or I will be sitting and writing poems.
My feelings change toward a person easily, that is true. The moment I realize my friend or best friend has been lying to me or did something she clearly knows I wouldn’t like. I stop being friends with her. I can’t help my neutral feeling. That is how I prevent my self from getting hurt. By feeling nothing toward that person. I literally go to the mode of ” not giving a god damn care”. Which I am good at.
One of my friends told me I am too arrogant. Nope, its okay, I would rather get bad things about me, than good things that are lies. So I thought about it. And yes, it is true. I am, I can’t help my self, but I try controlling what I think and how I say it. I don’t like hurting people. But I never really care about what others think about me. I am who I am. I don’t give a flying monkey if there is a group of people in the corner talking about me. Because, that doesn’t define me. What defines me is me holding my head high above, smiling to their faces and being neutral. But I do blow up when it comes to friends. I am a too good friend. The moment I become friends with someone, I find my self in a position that I should trust, and be trustworthy. I should help and get help. But usually, I don’t get anything. All I do is give. Which takes me to a position that I should take it slow with friendship.
Analyze your self. Write about your characteristics and how you feel about every part of your daily life. Because by doing that, you explore something new.
If you want the same thing go to this link below and read about yourself. I bet you will get surprised.