Trust.


” Don’t count how many people you know
Count how many people you can trust with your eyes closed. ” Maria Zarif.

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” Katrina ” Part 1


” Katrina!” Called mom while I was sitting near the shore, looking into the water and listening to the beautiful sound of the waves, I didn’t realize I have been sitting here for more than 30 minutes. Why is mom so worried all the time? I wondered inside. She should take it easy sometimes… I thought to my self while getting up to see what mom wanted. And then I remembered, it was 4:45 pm and at 5 was my so called future fiancé was coming. All I was wearing was an old dress with my hair untidy on my shoulders and  I barefoot. Who needs sandals? I love the feeling of the sand on my feet, I never wear slippers to the beach.

I was running inside my house when I saw him, he was wearing a suit and was standing with flowers. Who on earth is he? Why would mom make me marry him when I don’t even know him? Yet on top of that, I didn’t even finish my medical university. I am only twenty!  I know that dad passed away and that she can’t afford the living, but I also know that, it wasn’t the real excuse she was making me marry this guy. It was that the people around the village thought I had an affair, because, well, I didn’t want to marry anyone. Thats why! And here comes the prince charming, rich, shaved, with flowers. Doesn’t even know me but wants to marry me. What kind of a guy is he?

I quickly hid my self and went inside the house from the back door. Quickly going upstairs into my room. Closing the door after my self. ” Katrina! Where are you? I swear this girl will never ever get anything in her life….” Said mom. The door rang.

I quickly combed my hair, put on my white ballerina shoes with a soft pink dress that had a white belt with a bow in the middle. I loved dresses. Even though I had those really bad looking legs from playing a lot of sports outside, I never hesitated showing them. After all, each marks define who I am.

” Katrina! ” Cried my big brother, oh my god, I think I should change my name. Frustrated, I was going downstairs, to see my fiancé and to talk to him. There you go, my new life. I don’t even know his name, but I will be his wife in a few months,most probably, if by any chance  I make my mom think about it  giving me time and letting me at least finish my 2 years of medical before marrying this guy.

 

Yes, I started writing my own I don’t know, book? Story? Doesn’t matter, I always enjoyed writing in this form more than in the form of poetry.Gave me the ability to show my feelings in words more than in a 4 line paragraph.

About me.


Okay, I never expected to see the ” lonely ” part.

In real life you will always find me sitting next to a person and laughing. Joking around with people. It is rare for me to sit alone. Because honestly, being alone scares me. I don’t know why but it just does. And even if I am sitting alone, its probably because the book I am reading is just too interesting for me to let it and read it later at home. Or I will be sitting and writing poems. 

My feelings change toward a person easily, that is true. The moment I realize my friend or best friend has been lying to me or did something she clearly knows I wouldn’t like. I stop being friends with her. I can’t help my neutral feeling. That is how I prevent my self from getting hurt. By feeling nothing toward that person. I literally go to the mode of ” not giving a god damn care”. Which I am good at.

One of my friends told me I am too arrogant. Nope, its okay, I would rather get bad things about me, than good things that are lies. So I thought about it. And yes, it is true. I am, I can’t help my self, but I try controlling what I think and how I say it. I don’t like hurting people. But I never really care about what others think about me. I am who I am. I don’t give a flying monkey if there is a group of people in the corner talking about me. Because, that doesn’t define me. What defines me is me holding my head high above, smiling to their faces and being neutral. But I do blow up when it comes to friends. I am a too good friend. The moment I become friends with someone, I find my self in a position that I should trust, and be trustworthy. I should help and get help. But usually, I don’t get anything. All I do is give. Which takes me to a position that I should take it slow with friendship.

Analyze your self. Write about your characteristics and how you feel about every part of your daily life. Because by doing that, you explore something new. 
If you want the same thing go to this link below and read about yourself. I bet you will get surprised.

http://www.exootlab.com/go/birthcolor

The Invisible Child


The invisible child
Sitting in the corner
Do you see him?
Do you know who he truly is?

The invisible child,
He doesn’t speak, why should you bother talking
If he doesn’t speak?

The invisible child
Doesn’t talk at all
Sitting in the corner
Lost in his own world

Do you see him?
Do you ?
He is in the corner
Over there.

The invisible child, wait who is he?
Do you know him very well?
Have you ever tried talking?
No, he is invisible, you can’t see him

You are lost in your own world
Thinking about your self only.
The invisible child, have you ever wondered
Why on earth is he so silent?

You did try to talk, but not enough to call it a conversation
Don’t avoid the invisible child
Don’t let him drown in his world
Lend a hand
Try

Maybe he is the meaning to your life
Maybe he is the friend you always needed
Perhaps he is the lover you always wanted but never knew existed
And maybe he will be your protecter

 Or will just help you like you should now…
Don’t forget there is a story
Behind every invisible child

Don’t judge because
You could have been one of them.

Source: Google

My first award.


Yes, this is my second award! And I guess me spending hours on decorating my blog didn’t go to waste eh? 😉 Thank you http://thedaintydamsel.wordpress.com/ for nominating me [: 

And I shall nominate other blogs that I really find beautiful, which are :

1) http://theirisandthelily.wordpress.com/

2) http://chocolatesandraspberries.com/

3) http://thedaintydamsel.wordpress.com/

I don’t know if I am being too greedy with the award thing… but I am just too specific when it comes to designing the blog! Haha [: Have a nice weekend ahead! P.s. It’s already weekend here since the weeks start here on Sundays.